FUNERAL HOMILY

BOB HAUBNER (Rom 6:3-9; Mk 15:33-39)

There is a story about an elderly gentleman in his 80s who arrived at the hospital to have stitches removed from his thumb. He said he was in a hurry as he had an appointment at 9:00 am. The nurse took his vital signs and had him take a seat. While the nurse was taking care of his wound, he was looking at his watch, so she asked him if he had another doctor’s appointment that morning, as he was in such a hurry. The gentleman said no, but he needed to go to the nursing home to eat breakfast with his wife. She inquired about her health. He told her that she had been there for a while and that she was a victim of Alzheimer’s Disease. As they talked, the nurse asked if she would be upset if he were a bit late. He replied that she no longer knew who he was, that she had not recognized him in five years now. Surprised, she asked him, ‘And you still go every morning, even though she doesn’t know who you are?’ He smiled as he patted her hand and said, ‘She doesn’t know me, but I still know who she is.’

This story helps us understand how God recognizes us. Even though sometimes we do not recognize God, He recognizes us. The Old Testament people had dementia problem. So, God used to remind them that He was the same God, the God who liberated them from Egypt. He was the same God, of their fathers Abraham, Isaac and Jacob. God wanted them to remember him and his benefits.

When we cannot remember God or lose our memory due to dementia or Alzheimer’s, I think God talks to us directly to our hearts. I remember a couple from my former parish. Both were up in their age. The man was a daily mass attendee, but his wife had advanced Alzheimer’s. He had to literally lift her up and place her in the wheelchair and roll her down to the church and do the same after the Mass, and he kept doing it every day for all the seven years I was there, I noticed it. I had to tickle her between the jaws to get her to open her mouth so that I could give her Holy communion. She never spoke anything that I heard, except once, during the Mass while at the consecration when the words were pronounced, this is my body which will be given up for you. At that silent moment she said loudly, “For me”? Everyone in the church was so surprised to hear her say that. His name was Jerry and whenever he saw me, he used to ask me, ‘Do you remember what she said at that Mass?’ He couldn’t get over that. Many people wonder about such people’s spiritual condition. Does it make any difference to them if they did not receive the Sacraments? I think they are like babies. Even if a baby does not speak back to its mom, the mother talks to the baby. A baby may only stare at the mother, that’s all. Unlike others who need to consciously respond and receive the sacraments, those with these kinds of sicknesses do not need to accept them as consciously as others do.

One time, somebody asked me whether the people who die of dementia will recognize their family members when they get to heaven. Will they recover their memory? St. Thomas Aquinas, the greatest Middle Ages theologian, gave the right answer. Quoting Augustine, Aquinas said that Jesus rose again of youthful age, which begins about the age of thirty years (Augustine DE Civ. Dei XXII). Therefore, others will also rise again of a youthful age (Q 81). Therefore, have no concern that Bob will recognize all of us.

Rob and Shannon, your thoughtfulness in having the priest come over and give the last sacrament and apostolic pardon manifests your faith and concern for your dad. You shared with me that you did not want Bob to miss out on the important sacrament.

God the Trinity remains hidden in the life of Christians. And Jesus remained hidden in Bob's life for the past few years. There may not have been any visible significant spiritual movement in Bob’s life because of dementia. But Jesus was in him. After rising from the dead, Jesus appeared to his disciples about 16 times in 40 days. And of those, 4 were on the Easter Sunday itself. Then, he appeared in 5 weeks only 7 or 8 times. Why didn’t he appear more often before he went up to heaven? He could have strengthened their faith with more of his visits. He could have appeared at least once a day. But he did not. He wanted his disciples to know that his hidden presence was to be trusted as his visible presence. Jesus remains hidden in the lives of believers and he walks along side of them as he did with the disciples going to Emmaus but we do not recognize him. This gospel account shows how Jesus’ divinity remained hidden from the people, especially on his journey to Calvary. But at his crucifixion, the very Centurian who headed the crucifixion exclaimed: Truly, this man was the Son of God. He could see the hidden truth only when he died. God is powerful, but he also suffers with every suffering person. When we question where is God in this struggle he would be right there suffering with person. We should have the eyes of that centurion to find God in the suffering person.

The second reading clearly tells us the need to suffer if we want to enjoy heaven with Christ. “We know that our old self was crucified with him so that our sinful body might be done away with, that we might no longer be in slavery to sin. For a dead person has been absolved from sin. If, then, we have died with Christ, we believe that we shall also live with him. We know that Christ, raised from the dead, dies no more; death no longer has power over him.

We are in debt to God for all our sins. But Jesus took that upon himself, our identity, by his incarnation and his baptism in Jordan, where he lined up along with the sinners for baptism. And when he died, he died taking all our debt with him. No one is going to be charged for the debt they owed, after their death. No court in the world is going to file a case against any dead person. So, when Jesus died all our sins that he took with him were also gone. We are free from sins, and when he rose, he shared that eternal life with us. The veil of the heavenly sanctuary is torn in two at Christ’s death so we can go through that open door into the Father’s presence. Our earthly life is united to eternal life, and the link to that is Jesus Christ. just as Christ was raised from the dead by the glory of the Father, we too might live in newness of life.

There is a saying, Death leaves a heartache no one can heal; love leaves a memory no one can steal. But that is not true in the case of a Christian. We have the most reassuring words from Jesus saying, whoever believes in him will not die forever. Bob’s final pilgrimage has come to an end. We know that this life is not the final story. The dessert part of the meal is waiting for us, and Bob is going ahead of us. Let’s assure him the remembrance of him in our daily masses.

Eternal rest grant unto them, O Lord, and let perpetual light shine upon them. May their souls and the souls of all the faithful departed, through the mercy of God, rest in peace.